Just another average day...

Today was very odd. I will refrain from saying that it was "the weirdest day in Vietnam yet," because I use that phrase so often that it must sound trite and take away from the unique weirdness of each individual day that seems to trump the previous weird day. So I will simply say that today was just another strange day in Vietnam. Business as usual.

This morning, I was teaching my first class when Mr. Duc walked into my classroom and told me he needed to speak with me. In the States, usually this would not happen, or at least not so overtly. Perhaps he would gesture from the doorway and wait patiently, or perhaps he would have e-mailed me in advance and set a time when we would both be free to talk. But no. Mr. Duc is basically the Godfather, so when he wants to talk to me, class can wait. I left my class waiting and met Mr. Duc in the hallway. After much idle chit-chat about my visa (somehow the phrase, "Mr. Duc! I could get deported if this is not done properly and in a timely manner. It NEEDS to get done or I will not be able to stay in Vietnam and teach for you" does not sink in the first hundred times, so I need to keep reminding him that, yes, the visa procedure is of EXTREME importance), Mr. Duc said oh-so-casually, "Oh, and how about lunch today? Would you like to join me for lunch?"

Mr. Duc is too busy for lunch dates. I knew there was a catch. "Some people would like to meet with you. They need your help." Ah-hah. There it is. "Who are these people, and what do they need?" I asked. He smiled coyly and laughed. "Never mind that. Just enjoy the lunch and do not worry about them." Interesting.

After my class finished, I met Mr. Duc. We took a taxi down all these dirt roads that are very much on the outskirts of the city center, which was odd to me, because I figured any nice business lunch would be at some nice restaurant in Ha Tinh City proper. Well, was I surprised.

We arrived at, what can only be described as the Palais Versailles of 2011 in rural Vietnam. As in... if I hadn't been to France with my mom and visited Versailles for the first time this past summer, I would not have the vocabulary or the reference point to describe this building. Apparently it is a brand-new luxury restaurant with the family's living quarters upstairs. The restaurant owner designed all of the rooms himself, and all of the furniture and art is imported from Germany. Each of the dining rooms is designed with a different emotional theme in mind (what is this, the Ice Hotel in Sweden?). When we went into our dining room (entitled and themed "Romantic") to sit down, all of the men sat down except for one, who explained that the waitress wanted to give me a tour of the restaurant because she was very proud of it. He would come along on the tour and be the translator.

We toured all 6 stories of the restaurant, and then the 7th story private living quarters of the family who owns it. I will let the pictures speak for themselves.

Here is our dining room, titled "Romantic."

Frenchy-French decor.

This is the Diamond Room.

This is the Ocean Room (complete with an ocean scene under a plexi-glass floor)

This is the China Room

This is the lounge

I don't remember this room's name, but something equally tasteful, I'm sure

An Amish fireplace? In Vietnam? Curious... 

This is the Warm Room.

Now we entered into the family's living quarters (and I am unsure why this was included in the tour). 

This is the two-year-old boy's bed. It is complete with speakers, massage chairs, and a built-in TV. When I made the comment that "His room is so much nicer than mine!" the translator responded comfortingly, "I bet your room has lots of character too!" Thank you for soothing my worries, kind Translator.

This is the mother's bedroom.

This is her shower-bath with built-in TV.

This is their sitting room. There were antique WWI rifles mounted on the walls.

I wanted so badly to sneak a quick nap in her bed. However, I refrained.

View from the top floor down into one of the dining rooms

More decadence

Oh, and I forgot to mention that the architecture of the restaurant is conceptualized as an ancient mariner's ship. This steering wheel was taken from a ship and refurbished.

How many people know about my obsession with decorative globes? If you're one of them, you know that it's one of my biggest decadent fantasies to buy one of those semi-precious stone globes where each country is marked by a different stone. This Vietnamese family is living my dream, what with the TV in the bathtub, the plush Valentine's-themed bed, and the semi-precious stone globe.

Oh yeah, and they had antique German motorbikes complete with sidecars.

The outside of the impressive building, and Mr. Duc in the doorway

The existence of this restaurant/house is probably one of the most baffling mysteries in Ha Tinh yet. Who is this extremely wealthy family, why do they live in Ha Tinh, who does their restaurant cater to, and how can they possibly make a living in a province of farmers who could never afford to eat there? Oh yeah, one other question........ who taught them that it is necessary to have a TV built into every piece of furniture that they own?

Oh right, but lest we forget that the purpose of my visit to this restaurant was not to tour an architectural gem, but instead, to be bribed into doing a task I probably wasn't going to be interested in doing.

Finally, we sat down after the tour, and the meal was served. (Believe it or not, the meal was just fine, but I was too busy taking pictures of the building that I forgot to take pictures of the food!) The men introduced themselves. Two of them were English teachers at Ha Tinh Gifted High School, and one was the headmaster. The two English teachers are good friends with Mr. Duc and speak lovely English, and they translated for the headmaster.

So here's the deal:

Ha Tinh Gifted High School is participating in the National Gifted Students exam. It sounds like the exam is a BFD and will determine the success (read: getting out of Ha Tinh and making it in America or another English-speaking country) of many of the high school students that do well. Furthermore, as somebody who attended a private school and knows that their best interests are not only in the students, but in the endowment and investments and donors and blah blah blah, Ha Tinh Gifted High School needs their students to earn good marks on the exam so that it remains a credible, donation-worthy school.

The test is modified for every subject, but the English major students at the high school (hereafter referred to as HTGHS) take a test that is specifically English-oriented. It has four main components: writing, reading, listening, speaking. Lo and behold, guess which skills the students at HTGHS are worst in?

Anybody? Guesses? Well, you'd be right if you had guessed listening and speaking because, hey, let's be honest... when do people in Ha Tinh get a chance to interact with native speakers? So, you guessed it, folks. HTGHS needs a native speaker to coach their students for the exam, and fast. The exam will take place January 10, and of the 35 English major students in the 12th grade class, the school has selected the 8 cream-of-the-crop in the English department to go ahead to take the test.

These 8 students will take whatever free time I have to offer them, and please, please, please, will I help HTGHS and their English students? The problem with being asked for favors in Vietnam is that the people here are so sneaky about how they ask. They make a whole big hooplah about taking you out for a nice meal, getting you drunk, making you feel so necessary, making you feel like they will be nothing without you (hey... didn't I write about a senior thesis about these psychological tactics less than one year ago? I think I just may have...), and surrounding you with tons of people so that you are outnumbered and basically incapable of saying no. In fact, in all honesty, I completely commend the psychological manipulation tactics that are used here, because they are honed down to a complete science.

Furthermore, they had gotten Mr. Duc in on the action. Every time I pushed back against their requests, Mr. Duc's job was to step in and remind me (in front of everyone else in the room), that no, I do in fact have Thursday mornings free, as well as Mondays and Fridays, so I have two and a half free days that I could devote to HTGHS. Oh right, thank you for reminding me, Mr. Duc. I had forgotten until you brought that up! Glad you remembered.

The whole scene was so carefully orchestrated that even I, the master arguer and loophole-finder and player of hardball, had a hard time finding a way to turn down their offer. So I have, once more, given away another chunk of my free time. Thursday morning is no longer my sleep-in-and-then-work-out-and-then-do-laundry-before-class day. Thursday morning is now the same as my Tuesday and Wednesday, as in "Wake up, eat a quick breakfast, rush to class, take a quick nap and grab lunch to-go, and rush to my next class. Don't take any breaths until 5 PM when classes are over for the day."

I realize that this is not the end of the world, and I am still perfectly capable of saying no when something is truly too much for me. The problem is that I think that breaking point of "too much" might creep up on me without my realizing it. I feel like the frog that, instead of being put in a pot of boiling water and jumping out right away, is placed in a pot of tepid water that is slowly brought to a boil without his noticing. Then the frog is boiled to death. (Sorry for the graphic image)

This is so perfectly cult-like. First Ha Tinh University just wants me to attend a meeting or two, but no commitments, really! But then they want me to pass out leaflets at the third meeting as a way to get involved. Fine. But then, next thing I know, I end up selling my house, giving all of my income to the cult, and moving to French Guyana where I am forced to drink cyanide-laced Flavor-Aid? Oh wait, no... that already happened. Ok, I realize that I am exaggerating, but the tactics of slowly drawing me in and turning me into a corporate slave are quite transparent, at least to me.

Oh well, the one exciting part of working with these 8 students is that they are literally the most gifted, talented, motivated, excited English speakers in probably all of Ha Tinh Province. I already know from teaching a sample class with MJ there a few months ago that these students are brilliant, and much more talented than my students at University-level. Therefore, I'm actually excited to work with these students and to hopefully make a difference for them.

With a lot of my University students, I feel guilty to say, but I know a lot of them are destined to remain in Ha Tinh for the rest of their lives as second-rate English teachers in high schools or elementary schools. Only a handful of my students are talented enough to become translators, university professors, or tour guides. No matter how hard I work as my one lone self, I cannot make up for the educational and socioeconomic inequalities that my students have been facing all their lives.

However, with these gifted students, my work with them may actually be the final push that allows them the test scores to study abroad in America, get jobs for multi-national corporations, and become professors at good Vietnamese universities. Knowing all of that, I realize that my presence and help really will be valued, and that my time will be put to good use.

Day 1 with my new class begins on Thursday, and I'm eager to see what they need from me.

The other highlight (and really strange part) of my day was that at this lunch, each of us had our own private waiter with a walkie-talkie that presumably connected them to the kitchen and to the rest of the wait-staff, who were all waiting outside the (locked) dining room door as back-up. One of the courses during the meal was fried chicken wings (which was divine, I might add), and every time I finished a piece and put the bones back down on my plate, my personal waitress came over with a pair of chopsticks and deftly removed the bone from my plate into a trash receptacle. And then, every time I took a sip of beer (a required drink at these seal-the-deal kinds of meetings), she would come over and refill that one sip's worth of beer back into my glass.

The result? I ended up getting much drunker than I had planned to for my 1 PM class. Luckily, it was my favorite group of girls, and luckily my drunkenness was the kind that allowed me to be really excited about teaching for two hours. However, after hour two, I felt the alcohol catching up with me, and it was certainly a struggle to see class through to the very end.

I should note, to some of my concerned friends and relatives back home who may be worried about my flippancy towards going to class drunk, I HAD NO CHOICE. Drinking in Vietnam is used in business settings in order to finalize agreements, and it is seen as shameful and stand-offish not to drink with everybody else. Thus, this is one time in my life when I have no choice but to succumb to peer pressure. Sorry, Mr. DARE Officer, but I couldn't say no this time...